What a year...

Today I celebrate 7 years of marriage to my best friend and the mother of my children. I think back to where we were 7 years ago and how things have changed in our lives since then. It has been an incredible time with the normal (and some unique) ups and downs that anyone could expect out of a marriage. But this year as I reflect, it's not as much about the 7 years, but more about the last year. Because for us, all of us, this last year has been very different.

My reflection begins a year ago (March 13th). This was the last day my school was open for what was supposed to be a 2 week span to help bring down some of the local COVID-19 numbers; we all know that time was extended quite a bit. But something else, more disruptive to my personal life took place that day. My son had a seizure and was rushed to the ER. I was scared to death. The medical world was in full blown panic mode, so getting in the hospital was a challenge in itself. My fear that he had contracted COVID was unfounded (or at least they told us this, he was never actually tested for it). We went home and my anniversary plans were pushed aside so all attention could be on the health and well being of my family. I thought I would be able to pick things up in a week or two and life would be back to normal. But the days and weeks became farther from normal, to the point that I realized the normal I knew would probably never be back.

And as the year went on, more things changed. The new normal was accepting that everything that I once knew, once thought, would have to shift. My birthday was a Zoom celebration with friends. My school celebrated our first set of graduates by streaming homemade videos on Google Meets. Summer school was an at-home experience for everyone. My mother passed away, and while I did travel home for her services, the majority of people "in attendance" watched via livestream on Facebook. And just as things were "getting better", the holiday travel season spikes sent numbers back up and my students (the few who did make it in the building) back home.

In this last year of marriage I had to make so many adjustments. Some honestly were good. I have spent more time with my family than I could have imagined. I saved some money because commuting expenses didn't exist. I became an IT wiz. I had time to commit to more projects. But for all the good, there was so much bad. too much to enumerate on this post. And so much has changed. Some things will never be the same. Some people will never be the same. Some people are gone forever.

As I look forward to this next year of my life with my wife and family, I still look at uncertainty. Our kids are healthy in most ways, but I know there is some trauma that needs to be unpacked. I wonder what possibilities no longer exist, what old routines have been changed for a while (or forever). As a school leader, I look ahead to similar uncertainties. What have my teachers and students endured that have changed them? What do I have to put in place to bring things to a better place? What is not coming back? Who is not coming back?

Today I look in my wife's eyes with joy that we have made it this far and optimism that if we could survive this past year, we could get through anything. I try to have that same mindset with my professional life. This year didn't break me, and I hope that it prepared me to get through the new obstacles and create a new way of doing things. A better way. What a difference a year makes.