and in my heart

are flowers

dying,

waiting

for the sun

to glow

again

spring // ma.c.a

I just wanted to meet someone who will send me the feelings that I’m craving for. Someone who will make me realize—that kind of love isn’t impossible at all.

possibilities // ma.c.a

I wanted to reach the stars, because it made me wonder what I’ll do afterwards.

lost motivation // ma.c.a

“There are a lot of people who read me, but understand me differently.” she stared at him, her eyes sad but she’s smiling. She looked far ahead, then she continued, “And I couldn’t make all of them see me, the way I always wanted to be. But…you see, I already made myself believe, that’s totally fine. I guess, that’s just real life.” there’s a long second of silence before she finally uttered, “I thought that maybe, even though I couldn’t accept it, it’s perfectly okay to know that including you, I’m just not everyone’s favorite kind of book.”

would you keep me if i was her? // ma.c.a

all we ever need

is to understand,

yet sometimes

even doing that

is hard

where should i go? // ma.c.a

You’ll never know how much damage you caused someone, until they detached themselves away from you.

Falling Petals // ma.c.a

I just know you, through his stories. I don’t know you personally but you’ve just awaken my damn insecurities.

No matter how much you fight for it, if it’s not meant for you, it will never be yours. But it was not the thing you deserve the most, there’s something much better waiting for you.

You do a dreadful thing,
the joy in your heart swim,
you are sweetly smiling,
they can’t see grim.

People always say that if you don’t ask, the answer will always be a ‘NO’,

but they never told me that if I ask you this,

“Do you miss me?”

the answer will never be a ‘YES’.

Someday I’ll get tired of being sad like how I got tired of faking smiles.
Someday I’ll get tired of doing nothing like how I got tired of doing everything.
Someday I’ll get tired of waiting for things to happen like how I got tired of rushing and doing things immediately.
Someday I’ll get tired of being awake until 3AM like how I got tired of being still asleep at 3PM.
Someday I’ll get tired of being silent like how I got tired of talking to people.
Someday I’ll get tired of thinking that I’m not good enough like how I got tired of thinking that I am always be enough.
Someday I’ll get tired of hurting like how I got tired of loving.

Don’t ask me about what I’m thinking. I’m afraid you can’t handle everything that’s on my mind.

I need to move my feet to walk in a different direction. I chose the longest path that everyone was avoiding from the start. All of them were taking shortcuts, while me, I have to take risk and not to rush. I don’t know what’s waiting for me at the end of this path, but I’m going to treasure all the things I’ll see during my journey. May it be good or bad.

We tend to hide our pain to ourselves because we think other people will find us annoying and dramatic when we tell them about it.

Lies were already diffused, while the truth remained hidden.