cj: the incomparable lucy liu as joan watson (the brains. [elementary])
Yuletide #I Can’t Even Remember Anymore
(I think I am officially Fandom Old.)

Is this the year I finally rewrite my Yuletide letter? I think it is!

Dear Yuletide Writer... [Fandoms: Dimension 20: Escape From the Bloodkeep; Hello From the Magic Tavern; Wilby Wonderful; Breakfast With Scot; Valdemar Series - Mercedes Lackey ] )
cj: the incomparable lucy liu as joan watson (the brains. [elementary])
How the heck is it Yuletide season already? I’m not used to signing up while still wearing flip-flops to work. Aside from the fandoms, letter still hasn’t changed much. I guess I just like what I like!

Treats are enabled and welcome, both for Yuletide and in the form of tiny chocolate bars.

Dear Yuletide Writer... [Fandoms: A League of Their Own (TV 2022), Wilby Wonderful, 17776, Sky High] )
cj: grace makutsi (Default)
If there's no letter here by the time you come to read it, you can definitely go by the one I wrote last year for a general sense of me. I'm in the middle of moving right now and will finish it soon!

ETA: Clearly this year just kind of got away from me. I hope you were able to get what you needed from previous letters, darling author!
cj: grace makutsi (Default)
Making the yuletide gay, one year at a time!

Well, this is not the 2020 that past me dreamed of, but this is the one we’ve got. I thought about changing my letter up entirely this year, but honestly, I still want what I want and I’d just be changing it for the sake of changing it so it comes around again with minor tweaks (and almost entirely new fandoms).

Dear Yuletide Writer... [Fandoms: Fortnite: Save the World; Hello From the Magic Tavern; Julie and the Phantoms; Murdoch Mysteries] )
cj: rachel zane (will one day pwn you all. [suits])
So I've been using this icon since I was writing in Suits fandom and I just now realised as I was picking an icon for my annual Yuletide letter - which apparently is the only time I use this anymore - that the keywords for it are "will one day pwn you all". I leave it at that.

Anyway. It's Yuletide time again!

Dear Yuletide Writer... [ Fandoms: Whitechapel ; Schitt's Creek ; Imagine Me & You ; The Exorcist (TV) ; Justified ] )

Trope Bingo

Jan. 2nd, 2016 02:48 pm
cj: grace makutsi (Default)
It's been a long time since I've tried anything like this. But I love everything this card chooses to be.


CHARACTER IN DISTRESS CHOSEN FAMILY LOCKED IN AU: APOCALYPSE IN VINO VERITAS/ DRUNK FIC
BETS/WAGERS UNREQUITED LOVE/PINING IN ANOTHER MANS SHOES ACCIDENTAL HERO CELEBRATORY KISS
PERSPECTIVE FLIP FAKE RELATIONSHIP FREE SPACE HAUNTED HOUSE AU: ALTERNATE PROFESSIONS
COMING OUT (OF THE CLOSET) AU: FANTASY MATCHMAKER LOVE TRIANGLE LANGUAGE/ TRANSLATION
ART IMITATES LIFE TRUTH OR DARE FIRST TIME/ LAST TIME MARRIAGE UNEXPECTED FRIENDSHIP



Now I just need to figure out what fandom I'm even in right now.
cj: grace makutsi (Default)
Hi, Dreamwidth. Been a while! Before I head back to work next week I'll do a yuletide roundup and sundry housekeeping things, but mostly I'm dashing something off right this moment because the sense of fannish community I got from participating on dreamwidth (and previously livejournal) has been missing from my life, despite still being active in fandom, and I'm taking steps to get that back. So here I be! And hopefully it won't take me to long to find a groove and a place again.
cj: the incomparable lucy liu as joan watson (the brains. [elementary])
Yuletide! Lucky number thirteen!

This surely doesn't need to be said, but since I've requested a couple current fandoms this year in which certain revelations and/or events are perhaps better discovered as one watches, better safe than sorry: Here there be spoilers for things that have aired in the past year.

Dear Yuletide Writer... [Fandoms: Promised Land - Connie Willis & Cynthia Felice, Black Sails, Penny Dreadful, Whitechapel, Twin Peaks] )

Have fun, and I look forward to meeting you in January!

As I post this, I realise that I really only ever use this journal for Yuletide anymore. Maybe I'll have to change that in the coming year. In the meantime, even if you're not a Yuletider, some other ways to find me elsewhere on the internet are also under the cut.
cj: (before sunrise. [weekend])
When I found out last year that there wouldn't be a kink bingo round this year, I made sure to get a bingo just before the end of the round and tuck the additional card away for this year. Because I know myself, I figured I would make it to maybe Christmas before peeking, but my willpower was strong! And so at 12:06 a.m. today, July 1, I first looked at my (unofficial) kink bingo card for this year.

kink bingo 2014 )

Rules | How to make bingos | Achievements | Kink wiki | Posting guidelines
cj: grace makutsi (Default)
I am here. I am carrying on. :)

Justified is back! And inspired me to go back and rewatch season 1 forward whilst working on other things. It got me thinking that it really is a very particular thing, moving back to a rural hometown that you never really intended to see again. That's not what the show is about, but then it sort of is in a way, and now that I've been back in my own rural, small-town hometown for a couple of years now that's resonating, especially juxtaposed against season 5. You don't intend to stay, but a couple of years down the road, somehow you're still there and so entangled in everything again that it's hard to pick up and go, and everything's a whole lot more complicated than it was ever supposed to be.

I quietly posted a story to AO3 earlier this week that's actually on a similar theme, in a way. I'm usually a pretty fast writer, but this is a story that revealed itself slowly, in bits and pieces and through several revisions. I started it almost eight years ago, and had a complete first draft at least three years ago, but it took a long time to get it to say just exactly what I wanted it to say. No story is ever perfect, so eventually you just have to stop and call it finished, but I think I finally got this one to where I always wanted it to be.

Ultramarine (18788 words) by cjmarlowe
Fandom: Wilby Wonderful (2004)
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Relationships: Dan Jarvis/Duck MacDonald, Duck MacDonald & Buddy French
Additional Tags: Friendship, Suicide Attempt Aftermath, OCs, dealing with the past, life cycle of a relationship, Alcoholism, Canon Queer Characters, Coming Out, canonical background homophobia
Summary: The Watch scandal might have been averted, but for some people life on Wilby Island is never going to be quite the same again. That's not necessarily a bad thing.

I also just realised that I posted a bunch of stories to AO3 back in October that I never crossposted a notification about here. Well, that's all right. They're over yonder anyway.
cj: grace makutsi (Default)
It was inevitable it was going to happen sooner or later, even given the vast number of participants in Yuletide. For all of our weirdo fringe fandoms that the other doesn't know anything about, we still overlap in too many places. So this year, I was assigned to write for [personal profile] eudaimon.

So as you know, Bob, that means you automatically have two stories you have to write--your real assignment, and the assignment you say you have because you can't talk about your real assignment to the person you normally talk to about every single thing you write.

It kind of snowballed from there.

This year I wrote seven stories in six fandoms, and I think the only overlap with a fandom I've written for Yuletide before is Twin Peaks, which was actually my first ever Yuletide assignment so that has a pleasing kind of symmetry for me.


Assignments

Stuck in a Moment for faviconeudaimon [Whitechapel, Chandler/Kent]
Things often don't quite work out the first time around. Or the second. The trick is to get back on the horse, no matter how many times it takes. [8006 words]

NGL, when I first got this assignment I was thinking "Yes! Two months to write! I'm going to do a 50,000 word epic!", then I reminded myself what else I had to do in those two months and scaled it back a little. The trick was writing something she wanted, but that she wouldn't suspect was from me, which eliminated all the stories we'd talked about with each other. I knew she was more interested in established relationship than getting together, when it came to Chandler/Kent, so I thought, well, what about mid-way through the process. What if the first time didn't take. And of course everything they are to one another is tied up in the work.

The One of Us To Survive for faviconnotkingyet [Ripper Street, Fred Best]
Fred has always been a little bit angry. One cannot be a man of his proclivities, in his position and coming from where he has, without possessing a righteous anger to drive his action, fire to help him rise. [2076 words]

This request came up right after I'd seen "Threads of Silk and Gold", which was Fred Best dynamite. He deserves a happy ending as much as anyone, but more than that he's just so interesting to start to explore.

Sweet Little Lies for faviconNeotoma [The Constantine Affliction - T. Aaron Payton, Freddie & Pimm]
Freddy doesn't put any stock in those rumours, even if they are becoming more persistent, no matter how many of Pimm's sources are beginning to verify them. The Constantine Affliction is surely a myth. [2565 words]

I love writing in Yuletide fandoms where you know the fandom pretty much just consists of you and the recipient. And I was really into this request, exploring how the characters found out about the affliction and how it affected their lives (which, in Freddie's case, was not enough).

And It Looked Just Like You for favicongala_apples [I Want To Go Home! - Gordon Korman, Rudy/Mike, explicit]
Mike has no idea what Pierre actually thinks of the photos that Rudy sends him for his birthday, but he's pretty sure they've always had more to do with Rudy and him than Pierre anyway. [2721 words]

This was my favourite book when I was a kid. Little did I know that many years later I would be writing porn about them. Except I think maybe I did...not the porn part, but even then I think I knew Rudy and Mike were meant to be together.

Diane, I Am Now Upside Down for faviconomnishambles [Twin Peaks, Cooper/Bryson]
Things in Twin Peaks were always more complicated than they at first appeared. Both Denise Bryson and Dale's feelings for her were no exception. [2100 words]

Somehow my fannish life always comes back around to Twin Peaks. And I was delighted by this request, which was specifically interested in Denise and the changes to hers and Dale's relationship.


Treats

Only Girl in the World for faviconeudaimon [Whitechapel, Erica Kent/Emerson Kent, explicit (sibling incest)]
It felt like the worst cliché to say that they were two halves of a whole, but he'd never been the poet of the two of them and he didn't know how else to say it. [1499 words]

It's become sort of tradition that I write a treat for [personal profile] eudaimon, but this year it got to serve triple duty. Not just a treat, but a mask for the actual assignment I wrote her, and an opportunity to write one of the stories we've talked about that I couldn't write for my main assignment. Even if she hadn't half-known I'd be writing something, there's no way Ruth wouldn't have guessed this one was me.

World's End for faviconfenellaevangela [Rewind, Priya Bristol]
Priya doesn't know the name of the child in the photograph, the girl with her mother's smile, with her uncle's single dimple. She doesn't know her name and she feels a moment of maternal terror, because this child is her daughter and she's never met her before in her life. [1332 words]

I nominated this fandom but didn't end up finding room for it in my requests, so I was delighted that someone else did. I didn't have much time for writing left on Christmas Eve, or I think I would have written something much longer and more involved, but I'm very glad I managed to squeeze this little morsel in at the eleventh hour.


And of course, thank you so much to faviconokayokayigive for writing me the Cabin in the Woods story Tahiti Sounds Good, which you should all read if you haven't already.
cj: grace makutsi (Default)
Have been sleeping weirdly for the past couple of nights, which I suspect is just my body trying to revert to its natural sleep-wake cycle now that I don't have an externally imposed schedule to keep. Which is a roundabout way of explaining why the last two days are smushed together.

Just two recs tonight. I'll get one more post in before the reveal, I'd imagine, but like last year will continue to gorge myself on fic till I go back to work.

2 recs in Vikings and Velvet Goldmine )
cj: grace makutsi (Default)
No preamble today. Just the recs. Still have so much left to read. Still have no system.

3 recs in Interview With The Vampire, Maurice - E.M. Forster, and Northern Exposure )
cj: grace makutsi (Default)
Didn't end up back in my own home till much much later than I thought I would be. But I am here now! And ready to curl up in my own bed. Just one rec today—for Kings—so I'm not even going to cut; I got caught up in other things (like sleeping) but there should be much more tomorrow.


Get Up, and Go Forth (15344 words) by Anonymous
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Kings
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Jack Benjamin/David Shepherd
Characters: Jack Benjamin, David Shepherd, Lucinda Wolfson
Summary: Jack is well acquainted with failure.

I love how this story takes its time getting there, how people actually develop and learn and grow, together and apart.
cj: grace makutsi (Default)
Sometime in the night, the tide seems to have turned. I am still filled with more snot than one human body should be capable of holding, but at this point I think I am winning the battle. I have been housesitting this week, but tomorrow I get to go home, and much as I genuinely enjoy being here and cuddling with the cats, I think a night's sleep in my own bed will do me a lot of good.

More yuletide! Still haven't so much as scratched the surface of all the yuletide archive holds. I'm not reading these in any sensible order. I never do.

6 recs in Parks and Recreation, Galaxy Quest, Peter Pan, Point Break, and 16th Century CE RPF )
cj: grace makutsi (Default)
I was just reading through my yuletide posts from previous years and realised I have seriously been sick every Christmas since I moved back home. I know my immune system is a bit trashed from being around all this stuff I'm allergic to all the time again, but seriously. I could have copied and pasted from the opening paragraphs of previous years' yuletide recs posts: sick, sleeping, lying in bed reading.

I've committed myself to being here in this job for a little bit longer, but after that I think I need to go back to an urban area even just for my physical and mental health. I'd very happily move back to Toronto (or Winnipeg), but, you know, if anyone has any other suggestions, I'm currently very open. :)
cj: grace makutsi (Default)
I'm on Christmas vacation, so of course I'm sick. It's been a while since I was quite this bad off, though. Right now I've reached the stage where if I drug myself and sit perfectly still and breathe shallowly I'm okay, but if I do anything else my ribs are screaming from the coughing.

So I guess I haven't been around! First there was work. Then there was more work. Then, after that, there was some work. Then I performed! Then I got sick, and now it's now. That's a highly accurate representation of the past two months of my life.

However! There was still Yuletide.

I am one of those people who adamantly doesn't shake her present, so I was delighted when the archive opened with a Cabin in the Woods fic for me!

Tahiti Sounds Good (1006 words) by Anonymous
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: The Cabin in the Woods (2011)
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Characters: The Director (Cabin in the Woods), The Ancient Ones - Character
Summary: What's a little sacrifice when it comes to saving the human race?

I've been sleeping too much to have made the slightest dent on the archive yet, but here are a few stories so far that had a little something special for me.

4 recs in Satan's Alley, Peaky Blinders, Twin Peaks, and Brooklyn Nine-Nine )

This year I wrote six stories in six different fandoms, and none of them are repeats of canons I've written for Yuletide over the past five years. I don't know if anyone ever really plays this game, because there are over 2500 stories, but if anyone correctly guesses any one of them, I'll totally write something for them.
cj: winter scene (winter of my discontent.)
I seem to actually be doing my bingos on themes this year, which is something I always intend to do and rarely manage.

These five all ended up being explorations of the relationship between bodies and identity through solo kink: Steve explores the limits of a body he wasn't born into; Tony recognizes the nature of his engagement with the world around him; Natasha expresses ownership of her own body; Clint reclaims his own self-determination through his closest relationship; Bruce finds ways to circumvent the limitations of his bodily transformation; and Thor confronts his ongoing position as mythic in this world. I think some are more successful than others, but overall I'm really happy with how they turned out.

Mutually Assured Satisfaction (5000 words)
The Avengers (MCU). Steve Rogers & Tony Stark. NC-17. Kink Bingo Square: fisting/stretching. Also contains: voyeurism, sex toys, size kink, unclear consent to voyeurism.
Tony isn't so much introducing Steve to twenty-first century sex as enabling him. Steve already knows what he wants.

Crash (1362 words)
The Avengers (MCU). Bruce Banner. NC-17. Kink Bingo Square: exposure/exhibitionism. Also contains: masturbation, altered mental states.
This is only available for Bruce to enjoy when conditions are exactly right. He has to be alone, to maintain control of the situation. He has to be too exhausted to turn back into the Hulk again. It's now or never, till the next change rolls around.

Natasha, Or Something Like It (1730 words)
The Avengers (MCU). Natasha Romanov. R. Kink Bingo Square: possession/marking. Also contains: tattooing, sensation play.
An exercise in self-ownership.

Thor in his Chariot (1872) (1963 words)
The Avengers (MCU). Thor. NC-17. Kink Bingo Square: mirrors/doubles. Also contains: masturbation.
Thor discovers the legacy he and his kind have left behind on Earth, and grapples with his relationship to that legacy now, as well as the ways that coming face to face with representations of his other self make him feel.

Never Be Lonely (2291 words)
The Avengers (MCU). Clint Barton. NC-17. Kink Bingo Square: object penetration. Also contains: masturbation, semi-serious contemplation of mental health issues, past trauma.
There are very few people in this world that Clint Barton trusts, and he's not even sure he's one of them anymore. Hell, he's never been orthodox before, so why even worry that he's not going for normal ways of reconnecting with himself.
cj: grace makutsi (Default)
I suddenly find myself in Yuletide Brain and no amount of trying to convince myself that it is too early is making it go away. Really, I have so much stuff I need to finish by the end of the month that I shouldn't even be thinking of fandom at all this week. And yet. Yuletide Brain. Thinking about what fandoms to nominate/request/offer this year. Figuring out what my schedule is going to look like in December and how many extra writing hours I can carve out. Wondering how many family members I can safely blow off to stay home and read fic for an entire week. All for something that's not happening for months yet.

Send help?

Though. Good god, It's September on Sunday. What the hell? No.
cj: the incomparable lucy liu as joan watson (the brains. [elementary])
The beauty of going in to work at 7 a.m. (unnecessarily, as it turned out) is that I managed to finish everything I needed to get done by noon. Of course, the downside is I now need a nap.

I participated in [livejournal.com profile] bigbang_mixup again this year, and as is my apparent tradition arrived at the eleventh hour and suddenly thought "You know what? This would be so much better if I ______!" and ended up frantically rewriting up to the last minute. But it is up! This was inspired by [livejournal.com profile] suchaprince's mix, and I know there's some discussion on the subject but I believe there's a real art to putting together a narrative or thematic mix and I'm really pleased this challenge exists and that I had such an inspiring mix to work from.


Guided by the Beauty of Our Weapons (11690 words)
Elementary. Joan Watson & Sherlock Holmes. Gen.
Even for Holmes and Watson, some of the most important things in their lives take place in between cases, and adjusting to the new status quo is going to take some work on both sides.


Okay, so I'm not posting every day. I'm posting more than once a month and that's something, right? Right? :D?
cj: lincoln lee (mad scientist's lair. [fringe])
My tomato is ripe! Which sounds like a euphemism but this time is absolutely literal. I don't actually have a garden so I put a bunch of herb pots out on my deck and then sneaked a couple of plants in between the lilies by the back walk (I'm renting the house so the gardens are about 80% not my choice), which means I have exactly one full-size tomato plant and it has one large tomato on it (and a few smaller ones) and today it is ripe and after work I am going to go home and eat it. Never in my life have I been so excited about a tomato.

So I said I was going to link to the stories I've written lately and here I am, doing it! There are a couple missing, because they are part of an almost-finished bingo that I'll post on its own when it's done, but otherwise I think this catches me up to last night:


One of These Mornings (2529 words) by cjmarlowe
Marvel Cinematic Universe/Captain America. Steve Rogers/Bucky Barnes. Adult.
He loves that Bucky's so sensitive, loves that it's a secret only he really knows. Loves that he's figured out just how to take advantage of it and loves that no matter how much Bucky protests, he wants it too. (For the kink meme prompt: pre-serum Steve makes Bucky come from nipple stimulation alone.)

Possessing of a Very Righteous Style (3031 words)
Marvel Cinematic Universe/The Avengers. Natasha Romanov/Pepper Potts. Adult.
Sometimes a bubble bath and a glass of wine are exactly the wrong way to wind down. (For the kink meme prompt: Natasha fucking a girl over a desk with a strap on.)

Softly, Softly (3283 words)
Marvel Cinematic Universe/The Avengers. Tony Stark/Clint Barton. Adult.
They're easy. They don't make it any more complicated than it needs to be. Tony feels like he can ask for what he really wants because Clint won't feel some kind of weird obligation to say yes, but he probably won't say no. (For the kink meme prompt: Tony has a thing for flaccid cocks.)

The Cost of It (3067 words)
Marvel Cinematic Universe/Captain America. Steve Rogers/Bucky Barnes. R. Kink Bingo Square: food.
Bucky knows Steve too well to let him get away with depriving himself, but it turns out there are some things he didn't know at all.


I feel like it's a perfect storm of kink for me right now, between it being summer (which always brings kink bingo) and writing in a new fandom, which draws me to kink memes as I sort out my feelings about how I want to write characters. I swear I don't always write to prompts, it just seems that way right now. ;) Plus, they tend to be shorter, which means they're finished sooner than the several longer stories I have started right now.
cj: grace makutsi (Default)
Well, all the cool kids are doing it...

I really do mean to post to DW more often and then I get busy and I forget and then the effort of stringing words together in a meaningful way to describe my day, week, month, whatever seems like so much work. (Immediately upon thinking this I feel like I should revoke my writer card.)

» I did something atrocious to my knee last week, and I should probably see a doctor about it but I've had intermittent knee problems since a track injury in high school and they usually work themselves out so I haven't yet. If it doesn't legit improve over the weekend I'll go on Monday, maybe. It seems to be getting better, but then maybe I'm just adapting to a new baseline normal.

» Last weekend I worked on a short film, for the first time in ages, and it was exhausting in the best ways. I really wonder sometimes why I let me life go in a different direction from the things I clearly love doing. And then I remind myself it's not too late, and mid-30s isn't actually that old, and I just have to figure out what I want to do most instead of letting more time just slip on by.

» To that end, been writing much more, and starting to see patterns in my (original) work that I didn't see before. I think for a long time I didn't feel like I had an identity, as a writer, that I was unfocused and all over the place thematically and stylistically. And there's nothing actually wrong with that, a person can write in a lot of different genres, but I didn't feel like I was doing them all well so I've got a sense I'm in a much better place now. I just need to finish more.

» I've started posting fic directly to my AO3, bypassing the part where I link them from DW/LJ. Mostly because I'm lazy, and also because a lot of it is for kink bingo and kink meme fills and by the time I format the information in three different ways for three different places I'm ready to, like, get a snack or go for a walk or something. :) Maybe I'll do another post to link a few of them, because this seems to be getting kind of long...

Till next time, mes amis!
cj: grace makutsi (Default)
Writing-wise, it's been a very good summer. I've been kicking the tires of a new fandom (Marvel Cinematic Universe), writing short pieces while I feel my way around the characters and begin to make plans for larger stories (not all of which I've linked here but all are on my AO3) and it's been interesting. I've never really been able to write in comics fandoms (other than a couple of Batman pieces eons ago) partly because of the sprawling canon and various continuities, but partly because if it can be done, they do it to themselves. From deep character pieces to crazy AUs, it's already a part of canon. But being able to focus on one specific version and continuity (with a few pieces still brought in from others because, well, yes), I feel like I'm on good footing. Yes, everyone and their grandfather was writing in this fandom years ago, I know. And I was into it! I just didn't get the bug to write it till now, and now it has hit hard and Steve Rogers is my life.

But anyway, that's not the point of this post. The point of this post is that, alongside that, it's kink bingo season and I've just finished my first bingo!

Sheltered (2061 words) by cjmarlowe
The Little Mermaid. NC-17. Ariel/Eric. Kink Bingo Square: exposure/exhibitionism. Also contains: keraunophilia (aroused by thunderstorms).
There aren't any other humans out in the storm, but that doesn't mean they're alone.

Covet (1051 words)
The Wizard of Oz. NC-17. Kink Bingo Square: foot fetish/shoe fetish. Also contains: fantasy.
'Good witch' is a comparative title—she doesn't need to be that good to earn it.

Grown Up and Done For (1388 words)
Peter Pan. NC-17. Twin/OMC. Kink Bingo Square: anonymity. Also contains: semi-public sexual activity.
All children, except one, grow up. For the Lost Boys, it's exactly as complicated as you think.

The rainbow comes and goes (1940 words)
Anne of Green Gables. PG-13. Anne/Diana. Kink Bingo Square: sensory deprivation.
The blindfold was like permission, to touch all of the things that she'd never dared before.

Go The F**k To Sleep (1348 words)
Sesame Street. R. Bert/Ernie. Kink Bingo Square: endurance. Also contains: orgasm denial.
It's hard to take care of business, even in the dark, when you share a bedroom with your best friend.


For what are probably obvious reasons, I call this my "sorry about your childhood" bingo. :D It didn't start out that way, but when your first two stories are Little Mermaid (a holdover from last year) and The Wizard of Oz (because I'm rereading the series right now), you kind of want to make the effort to carry that through to the end. I might write some meta later about the choices I made, because it was (for me) a pretty interesting process.
cj: grace makutsi (Default)
Happy birthday Captain America, and also America. I wrote you some porn! #howwedoitincanada

I appear to be dabbling in the kink meme. These were both (briefly) anonymous, before I decided today was the obvious day to post them to AO3.

Window (1010 words) by cjmarlowe
Marvel Cinematic Universe. Steve Rogers/Steve Rogers. Adult.

It's hard to connect feeling the planes of hard muscle under his hand to the simultaneous feeling of someone touching him, like the two things are disconnected events (both parts of which feel very good to him all the same).


Going Down (3935 words) by cjmarlowe
Marvel Cinematic Universe. Steve Rogers/all of the women. All of them. Adult.

Steve gets all the girls on tour. Or rather, all the girls on tour get Captain America.
cj: tom daley, olympic diver (kinky and he knows it. [tom daley])
Kink bingo! I think knowing kink bingo was coming up kept me going this past week, man. (Thank you to everyone who commented on my last post. Much love to all. ♥ I am doing okay.)

kink bingo card #1 )

kink bingo card #2 )

kink bingo card #3 )

Card request post | Rules | How to make bingos | Achievements | Kink wiki | Posting guidelines
cj: grace makutsi (Default)
This is one of those posts that I'm probably going to be horribly embarrassed by and delete tomorrow, but right now it's pouring rain and I'm feeling so trapped in this life and it seems like something I want to do.

I know I've had some rough times over the past few years. I've found myself down some very deep, very dark holes that god forbid I ever actually talk about, and struggled very hard to claw my way back out of them. I know I'm doing that right now. And every time, I lose everyone I had and everything I built. I'm not asking why. I know why. I withdraw and I divert and I alienate and I'm so socially fucking inept that I don't ever know how to fix anything.

So if we've ever been friends, please know that I miss you so much. All of you.
cj: grace makutsi (Default)
As soon as the rain stops and it dries out a little, my pretties are ready to go in...

flowers and herbs

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