amy13

Day 1 of my 6 day work week is over and though I should really be in bed already - but instead I ended up writing a really long entry about a whole lot of nothing.

*hands*

Got up early, then managed to leave my effing wallet at home somehow (in a milk crate in my guest room? WTF?), which I realized AFTER I spent too long screwing around to make myself my OWN coffee with my Pumpkin Spice creamer, and was standing at the counter at BP, with less than 1/4 tank of gas looking into my purse going, "Um. Shit? I... don't seem to have my wallet?" and the very put-upon BP man said, kindly, "You comin' by this way tomorrow?"

Miraculously, I had $1.20 in my purse, to pay my $1.18 for my coffee - it occurred to me, that this is one of the privileges of a handbag, which men do not have. Typically, a woman can probably dig up SOME kind of change of some kind out of the inside of her bag, particularly if it's a gigantic "I can put 5 20 oz. bottles of water in here with no issue other than it gets fucking heavy," like mine (ESPECIALLY when she has up-ended her change purse into her bag at some point over the past 5 days and never bothered to be sure ALL of the change got recovered and put back where it belonged) whereas a man, sans wallet, is probably pretty much sans ANY kind of change.

I'm just saying.

Anyways, while driving in to work I began mentally rationing my smokes. I ended up turning down (and I'm not kidding) FIVE people who tried to bum off me, WTF?! Sponges!! It all worked out, and I lived to have breaks that lead to me being able to step back from the insanity.

My boss's boss had me set up some new client log ins for a new customer and I was saying, "Um... it's great we're giving them access, but there's nothing to see yet, because 'lo! They are so new that I didn't know they had actually officially purchased said product!" and he was like, "blah blah, they don't use us for support, but they want visibility and you may be going there to train them..." and I said, "... in Austria? ROCK THE FUCK ON!" and then proceeded to NOT allow myself to get excited at the prospect (dudes, I'm totally excited at the prospect!) and then I went back to my desk.

MY MOTHER EFFING LAPTOP locked up on me *SIX TIMES* today - and I finally walked over to the Director of MIS, WITH my laptop (which has a fortune cookie fortune taped to the top of it next to the mousepad that says "Pessimism never solved any problem" to which I am calling BULLSHIT ;) and proceeded to have a starting contest with him (I *LITERALLY* sent him 3 screenshots EARLIER in the day of my cpu usage taxing out at 100%, two fatal errors and one camera phone picture of my desktop existing as nothing but my wallpaper and the recycle bin - not even the start bar AND made a note that I had to TRY to boot it up 3 different times this morning because of disk boot errors and/or drive lock errors) and then VERY calmly said, "I realize you think it's either a shitty harddrive, or something with some kind of gyro sensor or whatever. And I know it boots up every time one of you or your guys so much as looks at it. But. I am going. To Office Space. This laptop. OMFG!!! Ifyoudon'tfixitI'mgoingtocryandcausedamagetocompanyproperty. In that order."

Supposedly, according to my boss who approached him herself as I was rebooting for the *FIFTH* time this afternoon, they are now looking into getting me a new laptop.

He threatened to give me a desktop and. *clings* I HATE my laptop (with a blinding, inferno-like passion) however I literally can NOT go back to a desktop for work purposes because I do TOO MUCH work from home and our proprietary crap does NOT run on my personal computer well. \o/ Much like the theoretical trip to Austria I've worked there too long to put ANY eggs in ANY baskets ;) but... I'm optimistic, because I think, if nothing else, I'm succeeding in making him REALLY sick of me. ;)

So... then I drove home, and the Rent-a-Husband came over to help me affix my new bookshelf (assembled by mois on Saturday, once I stopped trying to make sense of the directions and just took a few minutes to look at what I was presented with it went very well ;) to the wall of my garage, because I am not tall enough and lack lacked a ladder.

Our conversation on my way home today, in which I explained the help I required went as follows:

RAH: You called me Saturday and I'm just calling you back - what did you need? (in the background my goddaughter is BELLOWING "BLUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUE" at her mother. I'm still not sure why)
Me: It's a 10 minute thing - 9 of those minutes is your drive here, then home. Can you stop over and help me use the safety bracket thing to attach my bookshelf to the wall of my garage so I can use it for storage?
RAH: AH! A man job. (he's actually VERBALLY yanking my chain at this point, and I can tell by his tone, but damn him, I LET him piss me off)
Me: ... no... A "taller-than-me-with-no-fear-of-heights-that-includes-standing-on-a-chair-to-change-a-lightbulb" job. Plus. I don't have a ladder.
RAH: ... you don't have a ladder? (he is now HONESTLY stunned by this revelation)
Me: I live in an apartment.
RAH: ...
Me: We have maintenance guys.
RAH: ....
Me: I have a drill! You're also not aloud to bitch that it's a Black & Decker, though. Again: I live in an apartment, I'm not going to be using it to like, hang dry wall or whatever. Get your ass over here and use your foot and a half you have on me to put two screws in the wall.
RAH: Heh.
Me: ... this is why I'm not married to you, and J is.

SO. He brought me a baby (who handed me a zip lock bag full of fresh figs and bellowed, "FIIIIIIIIIIIIII" at me until I took them - she's in the shouting phase ;) She can ALSO whisper - but it's SO quiet you can really on see her lips moving and it's SOCUTEICOULDDIE!! *ahem*), and took approximately 9 minutes longer than the 1 minute job entailed, mostly because he was bitching about the quality of the bookshelf I bought TO PUT IN MY GARAGE - probably mostely because it's not Ikea and/or because I didn't let him build me a set of shelves, rather than buying store bought shelving ;) And, apparently, the ladder he brought is now mine to keep - as he propped it up in my garage and went, "nice ladder" then moved the car back in as my goddaughter pointed at my 3rd floor apartment and said, "A-me! hooooooouse!" and so we went up, colored for a few, and then they left and I had dinner.

I really do ♥ my Rent a Husband, but he's lucky he fell in love with J & not me.

Because he'd be dead by now. ;)

So. Now, I'm going to bed, proud in my random aquisition of a ladder, and ready to face day #2 of 6.

Here's hoping I don't have to Office Space my laptop until the harddrive gets ghosted.